Apparently, the Jacksons en mass are moving to Devon soon...
They had better beware... the completion is here!!!
Loved it!
Saturday, 5 April 2008
Money, Money Money
In the middle of a house move at the moment so really have not time to write more here BUT I simply had to spend my coffee break between boxes commenting on two parts in the news recently.
Community Tax - Simply unbelievable that our leading politicians claim this charge on their expenses except for the slightly whiter David Cameroon! Should now all government employees have the same right? Read the list here.
More on the Cambridge Congestion charge - Staff at Addenbrookes hospital have voted a resounding NO to the charge claiming that staff cant afford it and that, as they are public workers, they should be exempt! They want hospital staff to be exempt as it is on the outskirts of the city. However,in the coming years, there is a large housing estate to be built on the southern side which would encircle the hospital. Similarly, the residents of Girton are stating that they should be on the outdide of the zone. read about it here
Who next to become protest and demand exemption for this ridiculous charge? The boys in blue get an exception (as they would have to help to enforce the charge), council workers, social workers, black welsh one-legged male lesbians, company car owners?
Seems to me that once you make one exception, you have to make several exceptions and then you have to abandon the proposal as it becomes unfair.
Every time I am asked to declare my ethnicity, I fancy the idea of stating that I am a welsh black one-legged male lesbian.
Just for fun!
Community Tax - Simply unbelievable that our leading politicians claim this charge on their expenses except for the slightly whiter David Cameroon! Should now all government employees have the same right? Read the list here.
More on the Cambridge Congestion charge - Staff at Addenbrookes hospital have voted a resounding NO to the charge claiming that staff cant afford it and that, as they are public workers, they should be exempt! They want hospital staff to be exempt as it is on the outskirts of the city. However,in the coming years, there is a large housing estate to be built on the southern side which would encircle the hospital. Similarly, the residents of Girton are stating that they should be on the outdide of the zone. read about it here
Who next to become protest and demand exemption for this ridiculous charge? The boys in blue get an exception (as they would have to help to enforce the charge), council workers, social workers, black welsh one-legged male lesbians, company car owners?
Seems to me that once you make one exception, you have to make several exceptions and then you have to abandon the proposal as it becomes unfair.
Every time I am asked to declare my ethnicity, I fancy the idea of stating that I am a welsh black one-legged male lesbian.
Just for fun!
Tuesday, 25 March 2008
Education - A Simple Idea.
In the light of active disruption by spoilt children, the snobbery that can exist within the educational world, the suggestion that class sizes could rise to 70 when the teaching unions about to vote on class sizes, memos about the 'toxic nature' of family breakdown and the perceived increased need for support for the tweenager, education is much in the news at the moment.
It seems that everyone, and teachers in particular, want to teach only the best motivated students and then in groups of twenty or so. However, class sizes are around thirty and there are some in every class that seek to disrupt lessons.
In the next government where Jeremy Clarkson is PM and I become the Secretary of State for Education. At least and unlike many education secretaries before hand, I can speak of having many years experience in this field.
Back to the point!
Here is the manifesto of solely one item but the one item that will radically improve all schools.
Attending school becomes OPTIONAL for all pupils over the age of 14.
This will have the following effects;
Alas, I do not think that it will happen as I am pathologically honest and would be unable to complete an expense form.
It seems that everyone, and teachers in particular, want to teach only the best motivated students and then in groups of twenty or so. However, class sizes are around thirty and there are some in every class that seek to disrupt lessons.
In the next government where Jeremy Clarkson is PM and I become the Secretary of State for Education. At least and unlike many education secretaries before hand, I can speak of having many years experience in this field.
Back to the point!
Here is the manifesto of solely one item but the one item that will radically improve all schools.
Attending school becomes OPTIONAL for all pupils over the age of 14.
This will have the following effects;
- Only committed students will attend school and hence teachers will only be teaching the motivated. Teachers now happy!
- Parents will have to take more responsibility for their children as those who will decide to stay at home will have to be looked after. They become actively responsible for the futures of the kids. Parents focused
- Funding released by the non attendees can be used for the motivated. Head teachers happy!
- The 'bad' teachers will be redeployed out of the classroom and thus the overall standard of teaching will improve. Parents happy!
- Schools will have the right to exclude any pupil that is a pain and transfer the care of that pupil to the parent. Schools happy!
- Children will rapidly learn that if they want to attend school they have to behave. Thats it. Simple! Schools happy again!
- With the wealth of training opportunities outside of the classroom funded by the government, pupils who do not gain GSCE's/NVQ's/Diploma's can pick up their education when they need it and when they become motivated to learn. Government happy!
- Most of all, the function of school to educate will become paramount rather than to baby sit the currently ill-mannered and destructive pupil and allow them to disrupt lessons. Schools happy yet again!
Alas, I do not think that it will happen as I am pathologically honest and would be unable to complete an expense form.
Monday, 24 March 2008
No Anger
No more, no more
There’s no anger.
No anger, no more.
I couldn’t love you anymore.
Fed up with misery,
Fed up with crawling.
Mobile by my side,
Not me she is calling.
She left me hanging,
One September morning.
Packed her love away,
Left without warning.
Glass so empty,
Barmen please come here.
I’m fine being solo,
Just me and my beer.
There’s no anger.
No anger, no more.
I couldn’t love you anymore.
End of the Bar
And on a similar vein...
I used to dine with millionaires who spawned caviar.
Have social intercourse with the rock and roll stars.
Greasy pole has slipped me by, nothing left to lose.
I’m just the lonely guy sitting at the end of your bar. Landlord, send another beer to the end of the bar.
Not sad but lonely at the end of the bar.
My day’s been so busy, I’ve driven too far
One more ale please at the end of your bar.
CD’s were playing
In my car
Springsteen was singing
In my car
Love is a journey.
In my car
No-one joins me
In my car
Dreaming of a quiet beer
In my car
Waiting and drinking alone
In my car
Parked outside the pub
My car
Waiting for me when I leave the bar.
Landlord, send another beer to the end of the bar.
End of the bar.
End of the bar.
The day’s been busy and I’ve driven so far
Now I’m stuck at the end of the bar
I used to dine with millionaires who spawned caviar.
Have social intercourse with the rock and roll stars.
Greasy pole has slipped me by, nothing left to lose.
I’m just the lonely guy sitting at the end of your bar. Landlord, send another beer to the end of the bar.
Not sad but lonely at the end of the bar.
My day’s been so busy, I’ve driven too far
One more ale please at the end of your bar.
The shock was total, no four minute warning.
I’m fed up with the misery that she left me in
Thinking how she left me one September morning.
Keeping to myself with just a glass to cry in.
The A505, the boring road to Baldock.
Feeling successful driving my company car.
Got just enough change to buy another beer.
To be the lonely guy sitting at the end of your bar
CD’s were playing
In my car
Springsteen was singing
In my car
Love is a journey.
In my car
No-one joins me
In my car
Dreaming of a quiet beer
In my car
Waiting and drinking alone
In my car
Parked outside the pub
My car
Waiting for me when I leave the bar.
Landlord, send another beer to the end of the bar.
End of the bar.
End of the bar.
The day’s been busy and I’ve driven so far
Now I’m stuck at the end of the bar
Break Ups and Silly Love Songs
When Springsteen was breaking up from his first marriage, he went into the studio and produced 'Tunnel of Love' - an album with songs fraught about relationships and break ups.
When Marvin Gaye got divorced, his ex got all proceeds from 'Hear, My Dear', another unexpected excellent album dealing with troubled relationships.
What's the betting that if Sir Paul writes a single song that mentions love or breakups or divorce that Heather will sue? Incidentally, she has had her name changed from Mucca to Pornocchio as a result of the court case!
After all, Lennon and McCartney (both together and individually) have written some of the best love songs ever...
I hear Pornocchio and Sir Paul are going back into court over the small matter of libel.
When Marvin Gaye got divorced, his ex got all proceeds from 'Hear, My Dear', another unexpected excellent album dealing with troubled relationships.
What's the betting that if Sir Paul writes a single song that mentions love or breakups or divorce that Heather will sue? Incidentally, she has had her name changed from Mucca to Pornocchio as a result of the court case!
After all, Lennon and McCartney (both together and individually) have written some of the best love songs ever...
I hear Pornocchio and Sir Paul are going back into court over the small matter of libel.
Tuesday, 18 March 2008
I am so cool - official!
As I am 'billy no mates' down my local hostelry, not cause I am a social outcast but because I prefer to drink alone and read the daily rags! One can, you know!
Article in the Mail caught my eye...
Apparently to be cool you have to like/buy/do the following...
As I do all of the above, I officially claim the title of the coolest 48 year old dad in the whole wide world!
Article in the Mail caught my eye...
Apparently to be cool you have to like/buy/do the following...
- Fruit Smoothies (make my own)
- Muffins (I am a sucker for the blueberry and the double chocolate chip in Starbucks/Costa/Nero)
- Classic albums ('Born to Run', 'Crime of the Century' are my listening pleasure in the car)
- Memory sticks (I have one, my kids don't but I do! Should they be called flash drives instead)
- 20 bottle crates of lager (....yup....hic.....double hic....got to get another crate... am as missed as a pewt !...)
- Peppers (red or green or yellow in your spaghetti bolignaise kids?)
- Small oranges (tangerines...yummy!!!)
As I do all of the above, I officially claim the title of the coolest 48 year old dad in the whole wide world!
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